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Deep inside, everyone wants happiness. But, when we move away from happiness, we often become fearful.
The fear experienced is actually in our genetic code. It part of the biological makeup of the human species.
Even though we're no longer coming face to face with lions or other wild animals, these same biological reactions resurface when we think about future conflicts, or decisions waiting to be made.
We wonder "Will my parents come to visit us this holiday season, or will I need to drag the kids to their house again? Why can't they visit me for a change?" or "How will I ever pay the bills this month, I'm obviously sinking further and further into debt." or even "Will my boss find out that I took a two hour lunch today and forgot to call that important client?"
These types of questions and fearful situations cause cortisol, a hormone related to stress, to be released into our bodies. Cortisol can weaken the immune system, increase blood pressure, and makes it difficult to lose weight. Surely this is something that we want to avoid at all costs!
We have anxiety because we anticipate an uncertain or harmful future. We believe that we will lose the things that we have today, and that we're holding on by a thread.
Anxiety doesn't help us, it doesn't make the future a better place. Instead, it has the opposite effect. It hurts us, it makes us exhausted. We worry so much about things that we have zero control over. For example, worrying about your husband's reaction to your speeding ticket will not make the confrontation go any better.
Anxiety can also cause you to lose all hope, it drains you of faith and keeps you from the successful life you deserve. It causes brain fog and, as previously stated, makes you prone to illness. Does this sound like the kind of life you always dreamed of?
In fact, anxiety can even lead to depression as anxiety causes you to feel helpless. You may even begin to view your life's history as one series of disappointments after another.
How can you escape from this dreaded cycle of fear? It all starts with observation. Try watching yourself when you feel good, and watch yourself when you feel anxious, and try to determine what you did to bring on these states. For instance, you mean find that when you are anxious, you tend to hunch your shoulders over, close the door to your office, and that your breathing speeds up and becomes shallow. You may find when you feel calm and relaxed, that you play some music, organize your desk, and make an effort to reach out to others.
By changing the physiology associated with your mental state, you can actually change the emotion as well. The next time you feel anxious, instead of closing the door you may leave it wide open, and force yourself to make some phone calls. You will deepen your breathing. Then, an amazing thing will happen: You will have changed your emotional state.
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